It is fair to say that the #ENDSARS movement has transcended police brutality. It has come to be a thing associated with breaking down systemic issues, generational curses and advocating for a better Nigeria, and with the success of the protests have come a new belief that we can all achieve ‘the Nigerian dream.’ I was hopeful too- it was rare to see a Nigerian youth that wasn’t, but that hope came with the presumption of what the Nigerian dream was. I was under the impression that we had grown so tired of oppression, that we had been so inspired by the brilliant women that stepped up to help protestors, that we wanted justice for all Nigerians. I thought the Nigerian dream was justice. It is unfortunate that Nigeria is a country adamant on making hope the most dangerous and foolish thing to possess.

As the protests died down and the dust settled, it seemed like Nigerians returned to business as usual. Those who are marginalized, looked down on, scorned and mocked in Nigerian society went right back to being marginalized, looked down on, mocked and scorned. It did not matter what they borrowed to the movement. It did not matter how hard they fought. While they contributed to liberation their identity was stripped away. It did not matter then if they were a woman or an atheist or disabled. It only mattered that their efforts were helping those already at the top of the food chain in Nigerian society. They were always on borrowed time, the praises weren’t made to last. Because the moment these people began to attach identity to themselves again- the moment they demanded respect for these identities- wahala.

And perhaps it is the marginalized identities in me speaking, but it seemed that many people had incomplete protest slogans. It wasn’t just ‘stop killing us,’ to me it felt like they meant to say ‘stop killing us- so we can kill you.’ It felt like those at the top of the food chain (able-bodied, cishet, middle class and above men) were protesting because they were shocked at the audacity of them being marginalized. They were shocked to have to live the reality of those they oppress. Because that’s the Nigerian dream- the freedom to persecute. It was sweet for them to say ‘now is not the time’ and ‘focus.’ It was sweet to use the EXACT same language the government has used to subjugate us for generations. And as they say these words, it is impossible for them to empathize or even use critical thinking or at least MEMORY and cast their mind back to when the same syntax was used on them.

Equality is not a word that I imagined would have such a difficult to grasp meaning. From the very first moment I began to understand the word, I came to understand other words like intersectionality, empathy and ALL. Because that is what equality, and more importantly what JUSTICE means. Equality for a little while is not equality. Equality in some instances is not equality. And most importantly, equality for some has never been and will never be- equality.